In the world of evolving technology, we humans are often placed in such non-human worlds such as those of the dreaded automated voice systems. Am I the only one who simply cringes when I dial a number only to hear a plethora of choices that I must enter before I can even speak to a human??? Surely I’m not. And this is my story.
As most of you know, I’m working towards having a bariatric procedure done. As most of you are aware from your own experiences, insurance companies are not the easiest places to navigate through their phone system. They set up these systems like a game of pinball. You bounce around for a long time, until you fall through a crack and have to start all over.
But, to my absolute pleasure today, I was able to spend a whopping 39 minutes of my life (time I will never get back) pushing enough buttons on my telephone that I’m sure I played “Jingle Bells” twice! Unfortunately, I must have gotten distracted with my musical phone abilities that when I finally got connected…it was with the wrong department! Go figure!
Next, a riveting game of tag pursued for another 10 minutes. One human would answer the line and ask for THE EXACT SAME INFORMATION I just typed in! All this was just so she could tell me they didn’t have any information for me and would transfer me to another human. Tag…their it! Human #2 would then, you guessed it, ask me for my information yet again to confirm I was who I say I am. I would finally get to my questions…then, Tag…they would pass me off to another Human.
This is the part that I have to laugh at. (Cause if I don’t, I may bite someone’s head off!)
Human #3, although very nice, asks for my information. Once we verify that I am in fact the person that played “Jingle Bells” to their automated system, AND I am in fact the very same person that spoke to Human #1 and Human #2, then and only then do I attempt to get my question answered.
“I’d like to find out if and when my paperwork has been received, and if a determination has been made as to my approval for this procedure,” I ask.
“We got it. I don’t know when, and we don’t have an answer. Call back in 30 days. I’m sure we’ll know something by then,” says Human #3.
Are you kidding! 39 minutes, a Christmas song I can’t get out of my head, and all I get is to call back in 30 days?! Ha! They don’t know me that well! I will call back…daily. I will master their stupid automated teller. I will win! (Hey, squeaky wheel get’s the grease, right?)
As most of you know, I’m working towards having a bariatric procedure done. As most of you are aware from your own experiences, insurance companies are not the easiest places to navigate through their phone system. They set up these systems like a game of pinball. You bounce around for a long time, until you fall through a crack and have to start all over.
But, to my absolute pleasure today, I was able to spend a whopping 39 minutes of my life (time I will never get back) pushing enough buttons on my telephone that I’m sure I played “Jingle Bells” twice! Unfortunately, I must have gotten distracted with my musical phone abilities that when I finally got connected…it was with the wrong department! Go figure!
Next, a riveting game of tag pursued for another 10 minutes. One human would answer the line and ask for THE EXACT SAME INFORMATION I just typed in! All this was just so she could tell me they didn’t have any information for me and would transfer me to another human. Tag…their it! Human #2 would then, you guessed it, ask me for my information yet again to confirm I was who I say I am. I would finally get to my questions…then, Tag…they would pass me off to another Human.
This is the part that I have to laugh at. (Cause if I don’t, I may bite someone’s head off!)
Human #3, although very nice, asks for my information. Once we verify that I am in fact the person that played “Jingle Bells” to their automated system, AND I am in fact the very same person that spoke to Human #1 and Human #2, then and only then do I attempt to get my question answered.
“I’d like to find out if and when my paperwork has been received, and if a determination has been made as to my approval for this procedure,” I ask.
“We got it. I don’t know when, and we don’t have an answer. Call back in 30 days. I’m sure we’ll know something by then,” says Human #3.
Are you kidding! 39 minutes, a Christmas song I can’t get out of my head, and all I get is to call back in 30 days?! Ha! They don’t know me that well! I will call back…daily. I will master their stupid automated teller. I will win! (Hey, squeaky wheel get’s the grease, right?)
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